Saturday, October 18, 2014


So, I really meant to post something by now.  I just kept waiting for something nice and happy to post about.  There are some happy things going on in life.  But there are also some not so fun times.  I kinda hesitate to post when I'm feeling down, but that's reality.  I used to love to quilt.  I have so many quilts that I could be making. I have quilts I need to get machine quilted for other people -- and 2 Rubbermaid bins of my own creations waiting to be quilted.  I just feel like I'm stuck in quicksand most of the time, just too much effort to get up and do things.  Pasting a fake smile on my face and telling everyone I'm fine.  I don't find the joy in quilting lately.  Work has been stressful.  I've applied 2 times for a different job, but no luck.  I do love my current job most days.  I don't love the drive to work, spending so much on gas, and the lower pay.  I hate being stressed out by monthly bills.  I miss going to the grocery store and being able to put anything I want in my cart instead of keeping a running tally in my head on how much I've spent.  I have to admit I get so envious of people who toss one of this and and 2 of that in their cart without batting an eye {and I'm sure without keeping track of the amount spent}.  I used to be able to shop that way, but now we are on a tight budget.  Life changed and I keep waiting for it to be like it used to be.  I found a quote the other day:

The sooner you realize that it's never gonna go back to the way it was, the sooner you can move on.

I do have so much to be thankful for. But the fact is I miss how life used to be.  I feel defeated and run down.  I keep telling myself it's time to move on, that life will get better soon.  Just getting harder and harder to believe.  I'm not writing this post to complain or to get pity.  Just putting how I feel in print.  Hoping to come back and read this some day, thankful that I had this experience to grow!  

Well, hopefully my next post will be a happier, more upbeat one.  

The End.


Lavada said...

I also have a stack of quilt tops waiting to quilt. No desire at the moment.

As for the frustration and sadness of not being where you want to be or where you were, you're taking a great step forward in acknowledging the mood.

There is a great quote by Hinckley on that but I just can't remember it at the moment. In essence "All things things shall give thee experience." Somewhere down the road you are going to bless others through what you learn now.

Chin up, Happy days are right around the corner.

Carrie said...

Thanks for your thoughts, Lavada. :)